A sermon preached by Dave Shull
University
Congregational United
As soon as he realizes it’s the Risen Christ on the shore, Peter leaps into action. He puts on his clothes, dives off the boat, swims with all his might, steps up onto the shore of the Sea of Galilee, runs up to Jesus. By the time he’s at Jesus’ side, he’s completely out of breath. So he drinks in the air through his mouth and his
nose . . .
And then he smells it. A charcoal fire.
As soon as he smells the fire, I imagine Peter turns his face from Jesus. And runs away as fast as he can. Runs down the shoreline, finds a big tree a ways up from the water, hides behind the tree, collapses. And weeps.
Peter weeps because he remembers. He remembers the last time he and Jesus were linked by a charcoal fire (this connection between the two fires is pointed out by Tom Wright, John for Everyone, Part 2, London: SPCK, 2002, pp. 158-59).
It was outside the high priest’s house. Jesus was inside being interrogated. Peter was crouched in the shadows outside, warming himself around the charcoal fire. There three times he denied even knowing Jesus. So now, crouched behind the tree, Peter weeps because he remembers that other charcoal fire. Having so betrayed Jesus, how can he now stand in the presence of the Risen One? Crouched behind the tree, Peter knows his name is Unforgiven, Unforgivable.
Where does the scent of that charcoal fire take you? Where have you stood as one who knows the name Unforgivable? When have you wanted to run away to the other side of the world because you’re sure the person you treated so badly can never forgive you. When have you wanted to run away so far you succeed in hiding from yourself because you cannot imagine ever being able to forgive yourself? You and I have been there. Maybe still are there at this moment. Maybe still feel Unforgiven or Unforgivable.
“Come and have breakfast!” Crouched behind the tree, Peter hears Jesus calling to him. And he cannot believe his ears. He knows the social customs of his day. Sharing a meal with someone means you respect him. Sharing a meal with someone means you honor that person. After I failed Jesus so totally, how can he treat me with respect and honor? Why would he want to eat with me?
After breakfast, Jesus speaks directly to him. He says, “So Simon, you tell me that you love me. Then I have a job for you.” At that moment, Peter understands what the resurrection is all about. Jesus Christ could not be killed. He lives! He lives to walk with us through our lives. For Peter, that meant he was freed from the prison of guilt and shame and separation from God and his community. Having a job to do for Jesus meant being brought back into the embrace of God’s grace.
And for us? What
does the resurrection promise that Jesus Christ lives mean for us? It means Christ has a job for us to do. And part of that job is to be God’s forgiving
and forgiven people. The resurrection promises
us that the Risen Christ never lets us go until we become forgiving and
forgiven people. And since that’s a
life-long journey, that means Jesus never lets us go. No matter what we have done or what we will
do; no matter what anyone has said or don to us: Jesus Christ calls us to
breakfast. And he says, “I have a job
for you to do. Go out and become “God’s
living, breathing, merciful, and forgiving peace” (this phrase comes from Megan
McKenna, And Morning Came: Scriptures of the Resurrection,
A Japanese poem offers this image of forgiveness:
I fall down.
I get up.
I fall down.
All the while I keep dancing.
The Risen Christ is with us when we fall. The Risen Christ helps us get up. Christ is with us when once again we fall. And as we get up again, Christ invites us to imagine dancing because he always has a job for us to do, always assures us we are forgiven and forgiving people.
I’ve learned about resurrection power from a woman I’ll call Lisa.
Ten years ago, Lisa was walking to her car. The first graders she worked with were planning a birthday party for her, and she wanted to go home and change into her play clothes for the big celebration. As she approached her car, a man grabbed her, stabbed her, raped her, telling her she was going to pay with her life for being gay. Over the next months and years, Lisa felt a rage so intense it scared her. A profound anger with God because she either felt like God didn’t care, or felt like she wasn’t worthy of God’s care. Both kinds of anger made her feel utterly alone. Then she would feel despair. And the ugly cycle would begin again.
Lisa kept asking herself, “If God has forsaken me, what right do I have to think that mere mortals would stick by me?” She spent countless hours talking with the ministers at her church trying to figure out why God had forsaken her. When Lisa describes the conversations she had with people at her church, she said, “No one tried to talk me out of my despair and anger. At church, I found validation for my feelings that I wasn’t getting anywhere else. At church, people told me that forgiveness is a process, and I don’t have to forgive this guy right away. At church, people told me how hard it is to forgive. The people at my church walked with me the entire way from rage to the time I imagined being able to forgive the man who attacked me.
And forgive him she did. Lisa had the opportunity to face her attacker in a courtroom. She stood before him to read a letter about the last ten years of her life. This is how she describes the encounter:
During the week of Ash Wednesday, I attended the
hearing where this man would be sentenced to life in prison without parole for
murder. I took the opportunity to take
off my denim shirt, leaving a tank top on so that I could show my attacker the
scars he left me with. All it took was
one good look at my scar-filled chest, and he broke down and sobbed. In my heart, I knew these were tears of sorrow
and grief, and that he was truly remorseful for his actions. As I stood there, it hit me. I was living my faith by forgiving this man
for what he did to me. I looked into
this man’s eyes, and I didn’t see the anger and hatred I saw all those years
ago. I saw the face of God.
Looking back on the past ten years, Lisa now says, “I couldn’t have forgiven this guy if I hadn’t had role models of other people in my church who showed me how to forgive.”
Lisa’s church lives the promise of Christ’s resurrection. Lisa’s church shows her no matter how hard she falls down, the Risen One will pick her up, and stay by her side so she can imagine her despair turning into dancing. Lisa’s church reminds her true name is Beloved of God. And calls her to be a Daughter of the Resurrection, God’s living, breathing, merciful, and forgiving peace in the world.
My friends, Lisa’s church is University Congregational United Church of Christ. May we always remember our call to be God’s forgiving and forgiven people for everyone who walks through these doors. Amen.